Most of the time, my boys are fighting. Screams of “No!” and “You stop that!” and “Get off!” echo through the house, the yard and even the store. I find myself shouting right back and even if they stop, I don’t get any satisfaction because I’ve yelled. At my kids.
Instead of teaching them how to get along, I’ve showed them that yelling works for Mommy so one day it might work for them too. Why bother getting along with someone when you can just yell to get your way? It’s then that I feel like I’ve missed one of those “teachable moments” that everyone talks about. Man if I could just see them coming instead of in the rearview mirror!
Then there are those quiet moments. The moments they play together without me telling them too.
The moments that Joe willingly shares with Jacob and at the first chance, Jacob shares with Joe. When Joe does these little things for Jacob: shares a berry, gives him a turn first, brings him a flower, shows him a bug…he’s teaching Jacob. He’s reinforcing what I have taught him. The “teachable moment” is all his.
I may not always be proud of my behaviour. I may still lose my temper “occasionally”. I may still even resort to shouting as a knee jerk reaction…but I will try to hold these quiet moments in my back pocket so that I can pull them out when I most need them.