Category Archives: Adventures in Homesteading

Part 3 of 3

“Do you think she’ll believe us?” asked Pipsqueak.

“She has no reason not to,” replied Pudgy.

“I know, but we’ve never lied to her before. I feel bad that we are going to now,” said Pipsqueak.

“Yes, but we won’t really be lying…just leaving a few things out.”

“Ok, but you will have to do most of the talking. Gomer and I would just give it away…especially Gomer.”

“Yes, I will do all of the talking. You just have to nod your head and say ‘yes’ or ‘no’ once in awhile.”

“Ok,” said Pipsqueak, still unsure.

When they got into the garage, they called for Lissa by scratching on the door.

Pudgy looked at Pipsqueak and Gomer as they waited for Lissa. “Ok, act like you are out of breath and terrified.”

“Hi,” said Lissa. “I didn’t expect you back so soon. What did you find out?”

“Oh it was terrible!” cried Pudgy, breathing heavily. “We were talking with the chickens when the coyote showed up. Oh the horror, the horror!”

Lissa looked slightly concerned, but thought that the dramatics were a little much.

“Oh?” she said.

“Yes,” replied Pudgy. “Then a dog came running, rescuing those poor, innocent birds, and us of course.”

“A dog?” asked Lissa.

“Not just any dog, a Great Pyrenees. A beautiful, shining white dog, fur as thick as–”

“No!” interrupted Pipsqueak, head in paws. “I can’t do it.”

“Pipsqueak,” said Pudgy through clenched teeth.

“I’m sorry Pudgy, but I can’t do it. It’s true, we did find out that the people on that farm had brought in a dog, a Great Pyrenees as Pudgy said. But, we didn’t see a coyote. There was no failed attack. We just saw the dog and confirmed with the chickens that it was protecting the livestock from the coyotes.”

Pudgy rolled his eyes. Gomer just sat there, biting his tail.

Lissa looked at the three mice, wondering why they were exaggerating what they had seen and heard.

As if reading her mind, Pudgy said, “Alright. Yes, what Pipsqueak says is true. There was no attack. We did not see a coyote, just the beautiful dog. We just…just wanted you to think we had almost died trying to find out how to get rid of the coyotes so, so–“.

“So I would owe you?”

If mice could blush, Pudgy would have. Instead, he hung his head in shame and nodded.

“Well,” said Lissa, and after a slight pause, “Lasagna for dinner. Did you all want a salad?”

They looked at each other and then nodded, afraid to speak.

Lissa went back into the house to start dinner. As she pulled the ingredients out of the pantry she shook her head and smiled, thinking, “Silly mice.”

Lissa wasn’t sure what to do about the coyote, but she knew it had to go; not only for Charlie’s sake, but also for the sake of the chickens they would be adding to the homestead. Getting rid of the one wouldn’t necessarily fix the problem though…another one would just take its place.

She wondered if Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer had ever had a run in with a coyote. She headed out to the garage to find out.

“Pudgy…Pipsqueak–Gomer!”

The three mice came out from the little box house Lissa had provided. Gomer yawned so Lissa knew she had woken them from their nap. They always napped after lunch…which they always ate too much of.

“Yes?” said Pudgy, stifling a yawn.

“We have a coyote on the property,” Lissa started, “And I was wondering if you had ever run into one in your…travels.”

The three mice looked at each other, fear in their eyes. Pudgy was the first to speak.

“A c-c-coyote? Oh dear.”

Gomer ran back into the box house and dove under a blanket, shaking.

“Well, I guess that answers my question,” she said. “Any ideas on how to get rid of them?”

Gomer and Pipsqueak looked at each other, remembering their run-in with the coyote at their last home. Chills ran down Pipsqueak’s spine as he recalled the high-pitched yowls, yips and yelps. And the howling…oh how the howling had struck fear in his poor little heart.

“Y-yes, we have…experienced their kind before,” Pudgy began. Then he launched into the story.

“Several months ago, while we were living on a farm, sheep were attacked by coyotes. They were so persistent. They watched the sheep for more than half a day before they finally went in for the kill.”

Lissa shook her head in frustration. “Great.”

“The family bought a sound system and tried to get rid of them by playing the sounds of a cougar–sometimes known to kill coyotes,” Pudgy said, “But the smart coyotes soon realized that it was a recording and resumed their attack, this time they got the chickens.”

“What did they do next?”

“We don’t know,” said Pipsqueak. “We hightailed it out of there once the cougar sounds stopped working.”

“You see, we weren’t entirely sure that they didn’t eat mice,” said Pudgy.

“Maybe,” began Lissa, “the owners found another way…maybe you could–”

“Now wait just a minute,” interrupted Pudgy. “You aren’t thinking that we will go and find out are you? We can’t go back there!”

Lissa looked at them for a long time. “You owe me,” she finally said.

“We do not owe you!” shouted Pipsqueak. “We already got the hawk to agree to protect the grapes and other plants from chickadees.”

“Yes, but the only reason I have not set traps out for you is because you are sometimes helpful. I provide you with shelter and meals…I suppose I could just stop cooking for you…let you scrounge for yourselves…”

Pudgy and Pipsqueak looked at each other and sighed.

“Fine,” they said. “We will see what we can do, but after this…we’re even, ok?”

“Ok,” replied Lissa, a triumphant look in her eyes.

To be continued…

Lissa stood at the kitchen door and watched Charlie as he sprinted around the yard. He was a funny little dog…a purebred Pekingese with the personality of a St. Bernard.

He started bounding back to the house but stopped suddenly and whipped around. Lissa took a sip of coffee and glanced in the direction he was looking. She stood up a bit straighter as she tried to figure out whose big dog had suddenly appeared in their backyard. Wait, that wasn’t a dog…it was a–

“COYOTE!” she screamed spilling her coffee. She wrenched the door open and frantically called for Charlie who was racing toward the beast, fearlessly determined to defend and protect the property.

The coyote stood at the edge of their brush just watching Charlie advance; his speed was surprising given his short legs. Charlie suddenly stopped running as if he had come to his senses and realized that danger was ahead of him. He did a little jog in a circle and barked in short spurts. The coyote just stared as if daring Charlie to continue his charge.

Finally, Lissa managed to get Charlie’s attention and he started to head back to the house.

Once inside, Lissa watched the coyote slowly saunter toward the neighbor’s field and disappear into the brush.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer waited a little impatiently for Lissa to get home.

“Do you think she’s still mad at us?” Gomer asked.

“I don’t know Gomer, we’d better hope she’s cooled down if we want her help with the hawk,” replied Pudgy.

A few weeks ago, they had found out that Leo the Chipmunk was eating her strawberries. They tried to help by leading him to a different food source… the garden. They had underestimated his appetite…he’d pretty much devoured most of her vegetables and then moved on to the compost pile. When Lissa found out…she was furious.

“Really? You led him out to my garden?? He’s destroyed it!”

Now they were going to ask her for a favor.

“Ok, everyone get ready,” said Pudgy as Lissa pulled into the garage.

Lissa saw the three mice when she opened the door. She was still trying to figure out what to do with them after the incident with the chipmunk. Some help they turned out to be.

“What?” she asked as she walked toward them.

Pudgy cleared his throat.

“Um, we have a…favor…to ask you…” started Pipsqueak.

“A favor?” Lissa asked. “You want me to do you a favor?!”

“Actually,” Pudgy cut in with a loud squeak, “It’s something that could save your grapes, when they come in.”

*******

After finally convincing Lissa to build perches for the hawk, the three tails hoisted a broken planter over their heads and started scurrying across the yard toward the garden shed.

“See anything Pudge?” asked Pipsqueak.

“Not yet,” replied Pudgy, “Please stop stepping on my tail Gomer!”

The mice were getting closer to the little shed. If they could get close enough to talk…without being eaten…they just might have a chance.

*****

Keira watched the mice with curiosity. What were they doing prancing across the yard under an old plastic planter? She had never seen mice behave in such a way.

Whoosh! Keira swooped down, lifting the tiny planter off of the mice and throwing it in the air. The mice froze and then raced toward the garden shed. Two of them made it under the ramp just in time, the other one was hanging by its tail from Keira’s talon.

Pudgy and Pipsqueak looked at each other and then up at Gomer who was about to become Keira’s next meal.

“Well, he had a good run…” Pipsqueak began just as Keira fluttered to the ground, Gomer still snug in her claw.

“Alright,” she said, “I’m curious, what on earth are you rodents up to?”

*****

And so a deal was struck and perches were built throughout the property. Keira looked forward to plenty of delicious meals and Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer were once again safe from becoming Keira’s next meal.

Of course…they would have to go into the Witness Protection Program. After all, they had sold their own kind out to an assassin.

Keira surveyed the landscape from her perch on top of the garden shed. For two days she had staked out the new territory. There were not many trees, but this made it easier to hunt.

Keira stretched her wings and slowly turned her head. Earlier that day, she had captured a chipmunk that was head first into an apple core in the compost pile. A trio of mice had led it to the food source and then quickly scurried away. Odd. After they left, the chipmunk greedily started eating.

How unrefined, she thought as she swooped toward it.

But now it was getting late, and she was starting to get hungry again. Her eyes darted quickly across the back yard…wondering where those three mice had gone.

*  *  *  *  *

Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer knew they were in trouble. Though they had never had any run-ins with the birds, they knew that red-tailed hawks were not friendly to the rodent family. They’d witnessed it first hand. Poor Leo.

“Wh-wh-whatta we do Pudge?” stammered Gomer.

Pudgy was still shaking. It had been a long time since they had to face this kind of danger. They had let guard down, had grown used to living it up in the garage with Lissa’s wrath their only threat. He was angry, mostly with himself for allowing it to happen.

Shaking his head in disgust, his eyes landed on the grape vines in front of the house. Grape vines, that was it!

“That’s it!” he said excitedly.

“What, what’s it?” Pipsqueak asked, eyes darting in case the hawk had found them.

“The grapes, the food throughout the property…if we can convince Lissa to build a few perches, maybe we can reason with the hawk…exchange these perches for amnesty.”

“Yeah, but–” said Pipsqueak, doubtful.

“Hawks eat meat and if they have perches, it would be easier for it to see its…meals,” Pudgy interrupted, guessing Pipsqueak’s question.

“And if we tell Lissa that these perches would help control her pest problems, she might stop being mad at us for showing Leo the gardens?” asked Pipsqueak hopefully. Pudgy nodded.

“Gomer,” Pudgy said, rolling his beady little eyes, “Stop chasing your tail. We have work to do.”

Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer were unsure what to do next. Obviously it was not the bee who was pilfering the strawberries, so who could it be?

The three mice watched throughout the afternoon but didn’t see much. Birds flew by but either didn’t see the inviting strawberry patch or had plenty to eat from the multiple bird feeders throughout the property.

“Let’s go over to the other side and see if anything happens,” mumbled Pudgy, starting to head to the far corner of the strawberry patch. The other two started to follow when Gomer felt something staring at them.

“Uh…Pudgy…what’s that?” he asked.

Pudgy turned to see what Gomer was pointing at and saw a small hairy head with two beady eyes staring at them from a hole in the ground. As if the creature had assessed the situation and determined there was no immediate danger, it slowly stepped out of the hole and scurried over to the mice.

“Never seen you three ’round here. Are you lost?” it asked rather rudely.

Pudgy, with a glance at Pipsqueak and Gomer, replied, “No. We are not lost.”

Before Pudgy could stop him, Gomer asked, “What are you, some sort of striped mouse?”

“Nope. I’m a chipmunk” it said. “Name’s Leo.”

And with that, Leo dashed straight for the strawberries.

“Stop!” Pudgy shouted.

Leo stopped and ambled back to the trio.

“Sorry, did you need some directions or something?”

“You can’t eat those strawberries,” said Pipsqueak.

Leo laughed.

“This is no laughing matter Leo, those strawberries are off limits,” said Pudgy.

“Says who?”

“The woman who lives in this house,” replied Pudgy.

Leo sobered up. He had lost two cousins and an uncle to the owners of this house. He had always suspected that it was accidental or that his cousins were careless, but if she had declared the strawberries to be off limits and they had been caught eating them…

“Look,” said Pudgy, “If you stop eating the strawberries, I will tell you where you can get more food than you can possibly eat.”

“I’m listening,” said Leo.

Pudgy, Pipsqueak and Gomer motioned for Leo to follow them as they headed around to the back of the house to where the garden beds were.

After all, she had only said the strawberries were off limits.